When I first saw a copy of Castlevania: Judgment on the shelves, I had a brief interlude of wistful memories of my boyhood, playing eight-bit Simon Belmont, taking on legions of ghouls and other assorted monsters in a flurry of whip-cracking, heart-finding action and adventure. I even began to wonder if maybe, just maybe, the Wii would manage to do something commonly regarded as impossible and give me a taste of my childhood back.

Imagine my shock when all they managed to deliver was a cheesy fighting game.

The plot is downright baffling in its over-complexity, and requires that you have a basic understanding of pretty much the entire series in order to fully grasp it.  I’ll do my best to sum up here:  Galamoth, a recurring character from earlier Castlevania installments as well as something called “Kid Dracula”, is out to destroy his rival Dracula (oh, that makes sense, kind of) by sending something called the Time Reaper ten thousand years into the past to take care of Dracula while he was still just Kid Dracula.  Anyway, this doesn’t sit well with a time traveler from earlier games named Aeon, who uses his time travel capacities to gather up a whole legion of possible “heroes” to defeat the Time Reaper and keep the timeline as it is.  Thus, you’ll pick one of Aeon’s possibilities and start beating the hell out of everybody you come across to prove that you are sufficiently The Ham What Am enough to go and take out the Time Reaper.

Basically, this is Soul Calibur with a completely different set of licensed characters, and for the Wii.  I’ll tell you straight out, this is not the best kind of game for the Wii to actually put out.  Why?  Because my arm hurt like crazy after just one fight.  You walk in as Simon Belmont himself, and you KNOW what weapon Simon Belmont has.

Yeah, a WHIP; thus, you know exactly what you’re doing in order to fight your opponents—you’re pulling your arm back and snapping it forward almost relentlessly.  And your opponents aren’t shy about blocking, either—it might take you a few dozen hits in order to actually win a fight.  Oh, sure, you can use different controllers to take down some of the strain on your arm and shoulder, but then all you’re left with is just another fighter game with some different licensed characters and not a whole lot in the way of good storytelling.  Sure, there are some unlockables to be had here, and that’s always a plus, but considering the river of crap you have to Shawshank your way through in order to GET to that Zihuataneho of unlockable glee, you may well not be that interested.  And if you’re not sufficiently interested to play for the unlockables then there’s really not that much point to the entire game.

I give them due kudos for taking chances, and don’t want to discourage anyone from doing likewise.  Sadly, this time around, it just didn’t work.  So the verdict on Castlevania: Judgment is to stay at least one hundred feet away from it at all times unless you’re an absolute Castlevania addict who can’t get enough of these characters and is prepared to slog through a nightmare of a game to enjoy them fully.

Since the launch of the iPhone and iPod Touch Apple has pointed to the high volume of games and other applications being downloaded as a sign that the devices are the wave of the future. Many Apple spokesmen have come out and claimed that the iPhone is going to drive the DS and PSP off the market altogether.

There’s a wide range of pricing for applications on the digital distribution store; many apps are free while many others charge a mere few dollars. Some games charge more and there are some more functional apps that can cost as much as twenty to thirty dollars. The marketplace is incredibly hyped with stories of people making small fortunes on the sweat of their brow (or fingers) being talked about as if everyone’s doing it.

Unfortunately according to a successful appstore developer, it’s not exactly the gold mine everyone’s hoping for. Developer Rick Strom has several applications that are highly ranked, including one which is #34 on the social networking listing. He points out to the public that there was a general ‘race to the bottom’ as soon as the app store debuted. After all when you’re looking for a tower defense game or movie listing application, why pay five dollars when there’s one for less than a buck, or even better, completely free? Though Apple boasts incredible numbers of downloads, they haven’t said how many of those downloads are of free applications.

While there are some people making money from hard work and successful apps, Strom points out that it’s like winning the lottery: the potential is there for it to happen to anyone, but more likely you’re going to walk away disappointed.

There have been a few false leads and misinformation about exactly what’s going to be happening in BioShock 2. One feature we’ve been told about that’s definitely happening is the multiplayer, unsurprising given the incredible popularity of the original. Whereas most games simply tack on a multiplayer mode without really giving any thought to integrating it into the overall conception of the gaming world, Bioshock 2 will offer a wholely fleshed-out experience.

Though the single player campaign is set ten years after the first game, the multiplayer mode is a prequel. Players assume the role of a plasmid test subject and wreak havoc in the civil war that reduced the idealistic city to an undersea wasteland. The gameplay will utilize the experience mechanic that’s been seen more and more recently with players unlocking additional weapons, plasmids and tonics with which to further customize their playing style. As you might expect, since it’s a prequel the city of Rapture will be in much better shape for the multiplayer levels with existing sites being rebuilt to show their former glory.

To take some of the pressure off 2K Marin and to ensure that the multiplayer component is as strong as possible, FPS developer veterans Digital Extremes are bringing their significant talents to bear on this aspect of BioShock 2.

Microsoft is gearing up for an epic marketing campaign mainly for the upcoming launch of Windows Vista, but also to shrug off that horrible decease which goes under the name “Windows Vista”. Windows 7 is slated for release on October 27, just in time for the holiday shopping season, and Microsoft just release the official box art for the three version, Windows 7 Home Basic, Professional and Ultimate Edition. Microsoft is yet to announce specific details and pricing on the new OS.

As expected, a lot of current Left 4 Dead players were surprised (as were we) that Valve announced the sequel, Left 4 Dead 2, and that it would be released this year — one year after the original hit the store shelves.

This has prompted outrage among some L4D players, who have created a group on the Steam Community boycotting the upcoming sequels. Currently the group has over 11,000 members, you can read more about it, and their reasons for the boycott, here.

Activision CEO Bobby Kotick expected announcements of price drops at this years E3, and he was, understandably, left disappointed as no price drops were announced by any console maker. He said ot Bloomberg:

Of all the things that the hardware companies need to be doing right now, it’s recognizing the difficulties of the economy and pricing their hardware appropriately.”

The CEO’s and executives of EA and GameStop have said similar things about pricing, and you can understand their wishes to be able to sell more game to more console owners. Although, if anyone can appreciate price drops in consoles, it’s the gamers.

Turn 10 seems to be very impressed by their upcoming racing sim Forza 3. While they mentioned the game as the “ultimate racing sim of this generation” at E3 — despite the fact that neither Forza 3 or arch rival Gran Turismo 5 have been released — Turn 10′s Dan Greenwalt said that the Gran Turismo developers have “passed the baton” to Turn 10, and that they now have the definitive racing simulator. We’ll see when both games are on the market and can be compared equally. Forza 3 is slated for released this October.

Gearbox Software’s open world action shooter/rpg game Borderlands will be in stores this October, according to the developer. The game, which was recently revealed with a new art style, resembling Crackdown, should receive a more firm release date in the upcoming weeks from publisher 2K Games.

While it’s been public knowledge that Sony intends the PS3 to have a ten year lifespan — the PS2 has already been alive for 9 years and the original PlayStation was being sold after 11 years on the market — Microsoft has spread words that the Xbox 360 might have a similar lifespan; ten years.

The Xbox 360 was launched in 2005, and Microsoft’s Shake Kim has said that they plan to keep the console alive until 2015, making its lifetime well over double that of the original Xbox.

F.E.A.R 2: Project Origin has recently been patched as revealed by Steam updates, adding two new Armored Front multiplayer maps. The full change log follows:

• Added two new ‘Armored Front’ multiplayer maps
• Unlocked Collector’s Edition multiplayer heads for all players
• Fixed bug with music cross fades when switching between two tracks

via ActionTrip